I feel like abortions should bother me more
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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