so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize