Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
