So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
