Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
