so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
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