with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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