scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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