why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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