problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done