I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
