I'm eating all of the evidence.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
