I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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