So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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