my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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