I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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