Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Randomize
