My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
