how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize