no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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