Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
