dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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