And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
