I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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