i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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