i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just send me my own nude
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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