pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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