Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I just gift wrapped bread.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
