There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
