that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Is Oprah even human
If I die, sorry about rent.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
