So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize