We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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