is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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