apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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