i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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