Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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