My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
