and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
