My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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