my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
