it's great music for shaving your balls
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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