Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He better not be in your backpack
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
