rhymes with "ouble enetration"
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
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