hotel room ftw
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
