my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize