so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
