Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
