how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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