We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize