How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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