Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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