she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Randomize